We all strive to bring these characteristics to our relationships. No one wants to be known as the “canceller” or the “flake” in friendship. Even with the universal expectation for accountability, we all know life happens. Sometimes we are forced to detour from plans or take rain checks.
I hate asking for rain checks, and it absolutely kills me to be the one who lets someone else down.
(Seriously, I lie awake at night and stew about failures to follow through on plans, even when there was no way to prevent it.)
Despite my extreme aversion to being a “canceller,” there is one person I let down way too often.
In Girl, Wash Your Face, the chapters are dedicated to the lies we tell ourselves. These lies prevent us from seeking out our most successful selves. Hollis shares in her writing how she debunked her personal lies and her methods for overcoming predicaments she faced with each lie. I hadn’t even gotten through Chapter 2, “The Lie: I’ll Start Tomorrow,” when my personal-lie-realization rammed me right in the heart.
When I was collecting ideas for my post on the Monster Hissy Fit, my friend Angela told me about a time when her daughter Brielle melted down and held up the queue for a zipline ride. The story of that zipline experience inspired its own post.
As many rides do, the Pumpkin Patch zipline required riders to be a certain height and weight and to wear a safety helmet. Brielle has wonderfully thick, dark hair. She always wears it in a high ponytail. The safety helmet for the zipline required her to lower the ponytail. Brielle was not agreeable to this stipulation and refused to let Angela redo her hair.
The line was growing longer, the ponytail was not fitting tightly in the helmet, and the operators of the ride were not willing to let her go without the helmet fitting snuggly. Angela did what any rational mother would do in this situation.
She shoved the helmet over the ponytail, pushed her daughter off the platform, and let the ride operators know she took responsibility for her daughter’s safety and the loose helmet.
After experiencing the exhilaration of the zipline, Brielle came running from the ride, face flushed back to Angela, and she cried in disbelief, “You pushed me!”
Her obstinate girl got what she wanted, but she did not appreciate Angela’s push.
Have you ever been pushed into something you weren’t ready for?
In my recent post about the fact that I don’t always feel okay, I think I scared some folks. Sorry about that!
I really am alright. I had been feeling down and thought there might be others experiencing the same emotions, so I shared. Thank you to everyone who read and reached out! It’s really gonna be alright, and we are DEFINITELY not alone in our ups and downs.
Now, I want to discuss why this sheep wouldn’t stop smiling at me.
This gal right here would not stop grinning at me as we admired the sheep pen at the State Fair. I finally asked her, “Hey! What are you smiling at?”
She just kept smiling.
When I finally petted her, she pressed her face harder to the gate and smiled even bigger. I realized this sheep was brilliant. She sought to manifest her happiness and it worked. She desired to be fulfilled by gaining attention. She was successful.
She smiled. She was petted. Brilliant!
What are you smiling at?
Today I encourage you to smile about something you are going to make happen. Whether it’s something as simple as trying a new recipe, taking a nap, or having a great hair day,put a big ol’ “I’m gonna make it happen” grin on your face.
If it’s something huge, like booking an Alaskan cruise or starting a new career, I want you to cheese it up about the certainty that you WILL MAKE IT HAPPEN.
IF you want substantially more to simper about, jot down a list of target tasks and laugh like a mastermind villain as you put your PLANS into action. With each successful achievement, another grin is going to make its way to your countenance and greater self-pride will prosper.
If you aren’t sure you have the energy to muster a smile, here is one from my dog Beast to get you going.
See! Even Beast knows you’ve got the potential to make your goals happen. She’s smiling because terrific things are going to transpire for YOU!
The Intentergy message for today: 1. Smile about what you are going to do. 2. Do that thing you are smiling about! 3. Smile some more. 4. Share your awesomeness in a comment on this post and so others get to grin about your greatness.
By: Melanie A. Peters
P.S. Sorry for all the bold, CAPITAL LETTERS and exclamation points!!! It was the only way I could infuse the appropriate enthusiasm into this message. I promise I’m not yelling at you to smile because that would not make you smile.
Is this what you look like?
If it is, please know that I was not yelling. I was interjecting joy. If you look like this, please scroll back up to the previous photo, put the grin back on your face, and go do that thing that is going to make you happy.
P.P.S. Please do share what you are doing to bring a grin to your gorgeous face.
P.P.P.S. The sheep’s name is Millie. She is a goal-getting, Missouri State Fair sheep shown by the lovely Loretta from Luzon Farm, and she should be smiling because she’s awesome.
Being overwhelmed is a constant state for most of us. The list of to-do’s can never seem to get to-done, and distractions know no limits. Being a list-maker can help, but some of us have a tendency to either make too many lists or put so much on our agendas that it’s not feasible to finish any of it.
At a coffee date with Maddy Hoeltke-Brown, we talked about the unconventional way we are approaching life with our side hustles and how the 8-to-5 scene is not the career path we have followed. Even thought we’ve chosen different paths, Maddy is just getting started in her business ventures, while I’m trying to evolve with mine. She asked if I had any advice to help with her whirlwind of distractions as she tries to get a good focus on building her graphic design business.
First of all, I do not profess to be a guru in business and my blog and writing career are just getting going, but I know a little something about helping people pave paths to success from my experiences on the farm and in the classroom.
To get started, I shared Lysa TerKeurst’s story of dedicating time to her desired work. In her book, The Best Yes, Lysa talked about making the decision to take her writing seriously and scheduled time on her calendar to do just that. TerKeurst reflected the first time she had to turn down a lunch date because she had scheduled time to write. The act of saying no to someone, because she chose time for her own goals, made her feel guilty at first. Eventually, Lysa found that giving herself time to do what she needed to be successful was the ultimate route for making her goals realities. I advised Maddy to do the same. Each week I plan time to write and most weeks I am successful, but I also realize that life throws priorities in my way and I have to compromise to keep the big picture moving forward. That realization led to my second piece of advice.
“Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of success.” – Arianna Huffington
It’s very rare to find someone who masters a skill with only one attempt. In fact, the attempts that we remember are usually the ones where we seemed to fail the greatest. While I haven’t had any huge failures to report as of late, I do have some pretty spectacular ones from the past and they have all helped me to find success in new ways.
One particular failure that came to mind was when I was first given the chore of mowing our lawn. I was 9 years old and my parents got a brand new Snapper riding mower. My dad showed me how to start the engine and the blades, turn the steering handles, and proudly set me off to mow down our unruly front yard. The one lesson that didn’t sink in was how to stop. On my first pass, I ran that mower right up the woven wire fence in our side yard. Fortunately, I was not injured, and the mower was okay (I think it gave up when I bailed from the seat.)
My dad came running and asked what the heck I was doing.
“Mowing the yard,” I screeched back through adrenaline and embarrassment. He pulled the mower off the fence, turned it around, and told me to get back on. We then practiced how to start and stop the machine before I was let loose on the lawn again.
I can’t say I never had another incident with a mower, but I can say that I became much more aware of what I did and did NOT know about a piece of equipment before I accepted the job of working with it. Now I know exactly what questions to ask before Dad or Hubby put me to work with a new tractor, truck, mower, rake, or baler. I know that to be successful with those implements, I have to possess working knowledge of they start and stop. It makes for a much more productive day on the farm.
“Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of success.” – Arianna Huffington