Lunch was Lovely – Thank You Letter to Dr. Deeken

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Dear Dr. Deeken,

I am so glad you accepted my invitation and am even happier that we made that lunch date happen!

I would like to apologize for taking so long to write this letter. Life just has a way of getting away from me. Before we met, I promised to limit my questions to 10. I hope I was able to keep that promise. There were just so many things I wanted to discuss.

When we sat down and I had a chance to tell you that my friends were all jealous of our lunch date, you said that you hoped, “We were not underwhelmed” by your responses. (Clearly you did not see how starstruck I was to be dining with THE Dr. Deeken.) 

As always you listened, shared, taught, and inspired me.

One of the questions I asked was “What was your favorite advice for parents?”

Your sweet and smart responses of “Enjoy each and every stage of childhood, (speaking from personal experience),” “Don’t sweat the small stuff”, and “Don’t let kids dictate; You’re the parent. You’re not the friend” were true to the doctrines of appointments heard by thousands of parents and still need to be shared daily.

The fact that you have 10 children of your own is still one that awes me. The fact that you carried a panel of about 2000 patients floored me. When asked how you managed, you gave tremendous credit to your husband and said something that too many of us feel in the healthcare and educational professions, “I short-changed my family. You can’t get time back.” In learning that you often took your charts home to finish each night, after making your hospital rounds and full days of check-ups and medical emergencies, it’s no wonder you felt spread too thin. I think it’s fair to say that you did a marvelous job of tackling some tough stuff. Continue reading “Lunch was Lovely – Thank You Letter to Dr. Deeken”

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Stars Can’t Shine Without It – Wise Words Wednesday

Stars Can't Shine

Darkness gets a bum wrap.

Many are afraid of the dark.

All too often we describe the tough times in life as the dark times.

The Dark Ages is a term assigned to the days after the fall of the Roman Empire and the years of struggle within the church for guidance and acceptance because of the uncertainty and haphazard rule of warring leaders. People felt lost, scared, and hopeless.

Even Star Wars warned us to not got to the “dark side.”

If it weren’t for the dark, the stars would not shine.

When life hands us lemons, we say, “Make lemonade.”

So why not do the same with tough times?

If you are going through some dark times, it’s okay to recognize the darkness. It’s okay to say, “This stinks.” It’s really okay to feel sad or mad or frustrated. Once you’ve acknowledged the darkness, you can find the bright spots.

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My kiddos entering the tunnel to create their constellations.

Our local library offered a constellation creation station this summer. Kids were invited to sketch a dotted outline of any constellation they could imagine. My daughter designed a horse constellation and my son created at robot. As they poked their holes in the “sky” with thumb tacks, the flashlight beam prevented them from seeing the darkness and appreciating the brightness of their work.

Once the holes were punched and the flashlights extinguished, the darkness was welcomed.

It took our eyes a moment to adjust, but once we had time to accept the unlit canvas around us the sight was incredible. Continue reading “Stars Can’t Shine Without It – Wise Words Wednesday”

I Can Explain… – Wise Words Wednesday

I can explain it

“I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.”

The hardest part of communication is when the sender expresses the message to best of his or her ability but the receiver cannot wrap their brain around what is being shared.

As a part of each week’s lessons, I include an article or example for my students to evaluate. They are then to respond to a prompt about the excerpt. In a recent journal assignment, I shared an article about research writing and the fact that your words should be the star of the paper and the sources are your supporting characters. I was very surprised to read the response of one student in particular.

Their response said that they had not understood their thoughts and words were to be the star. The student only thought they were supposed to use the words of others as they developed their paper.

Even though our first SIX weeks had been about what interested the students and what their potential thesis and counterarguments would be, that particular student failed to understand that it is the author’s words, thoughts, and opinions that make a paper relevant.

I started to reply to the journal entry with an apology for not being clear on the intent behind their research, but then I asked myself,

“Can I make them understand with an apology?”

Continue reading “I Can Explain… – Wise Words Wednesday”

A Good Laugh and a Long Sleep – Wise Words Wednesday

Good laugh and long sleep

“A good laugh and a long sleep are the two best cures for anything.” – Irish proverb

Exhaustion is not something that is new to most of us. Finding time to rest is tough too, but finding time to laugh with friends can be tougher.

Recently some friend and I did find time to be together. (It was our third attempt in four months for a girls’ night. Life is just too full.)

In the brief hours we were together, we enjoyed food, drink, and conversation. The best part was that with each drink, bite, and topic discussed we laughed.

That night I went to bed with a smile on my face and the evening’s antics running through my mind. The normal worry and weight of my day was not there and I slept.

I slept REALLY well.

The next day dawned brighter and I felt recharged. That laughter and rest were definitely what the doctor ordered. So here’s my prescription for you.

Make laughter happen. Find time to relax. For best possible results add laughter followed by rest. You’ll be glad you did.

By: Melanie A. Peters

P.S. I am not a real doctor, nor do I play one on television.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pouring From an Empty Cup…

two clear drinking glasses on table

Photo by Andreea Ch on Pexels.com

The last post that I fully drafted and shared on Intentegy was on February 28th. That was 110 days ago. So for almost a third of this year, I have not shared my Intentergy on this site. (YIKES!)

That’s okay because it’s never healthy to pour from an empty cup.

Each day life has a way of filling us up and draining all we have in one foul swoop. My days, while not all foul, definitely took a lot out of me.

This spring I witnessed, worked through, and experienced many powerful things and survived a number of challenges. Through all of the moments, minutes, hours, and weeks of existing, I continued to gather inspiration for writing, but failed to scrape together time to write.

For my absence I apologize. What I won’t apologize for is saying “No” to writing during this time. My cup was just too empty to eek out a weak post. As a reader, your time is too valuable for me to do that. Continue reading “Pouring From an Empty Cup…”

Your Strongest Excuse is Weak – Thoughtful Thursday

Strongest Excuse

“Be stronger than your strongest excuse.”

Some of my most amusing moments as an educator have occurred because of excuses my students have given for not doing their work. It’s funny how their minds work and what reasons they think will get them out of a pinch.

One industrious young lady gave the excuse that she had to “cut her dad’s hair” preventing her from doing her homework. This same student later used the excuse that she had to “rearrange her living room” and was just not able to do her assignment. Needless to say, her weak excuses reflected strongly in her poor final grade.

As I watch my own children try to wriggle their way out of chores and trouble, the excuses they give are amusing (most of the time). With each feeble argument, hubby and I try to use their sorry tales to teach them that excuses are not a way to build a strong stance.

As an adult, there are some people we just know will always have an excuse for not doing their job or fulfilling an obligation.

There is nothing worse that knowing you can’t count on someone. When someone always has an excuse for failing to pull their weight, they start to become dead weight pulling down the whole team.

Continue reading “Your Strongest Excuse is Weak – Thoughtful Thursday”

The Black Hole of Parenthood

Black Hole of Parenthood

When I had my babies, I didn’t really mind staying home all the time. My “free” time was spent caring for them. I loved watching them day in and day out, but as they grew to be toddlers and the newness of having an infant had worn off, I found that I really did want to do things outside of our home…………. without the babies.

At a family gathering my sister Olivia and I watched our kiddos play and lamented the need for a break. She explained our situation as being “The Black Hole of Parenthood.” We would not see the light of a social life until our kids were older and the pull of constantly supervising them grew weaker. Eventually, there would be time for having dinner with friends or dates with hubby, and we would break away from the forces of the black hole. My thoughts were that most black holes crush whatever enters them (I didn’t really want to be crushed) and (even though I wanted a break) I didn’t really want my kids to be big enough to not need me. Continue reading “The Black Hole of Parenthood”

Started Getting Ahead – Wise Words Wednesday

Getting Ahead MT

 

Samuel Clemens (a.k.a Mark Twain) is well known for the wit and wisdom of his writing but in today’s quote, I would like to point out he was a pretty darn good motivator as well.

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”     – Mark Twain

While this may seem like the most basic of statements, there is meaningful motivation here.

The old adage that the first step is the hardest to take falls right in line with Twain’s thinking. There isn’t anything quite so difficult as starting something new.

If starting something is just like any other task, shouldn’t new beginnings get easier as we start more and more things?

Of course not, the more we do the harder it is to juggle all the old and the more painful it is to consider the possibility of taking on new commitments.

Here’s the beauty of starting something; it is also a chance to change or finish another part in your life.

Continue reading “Started Getting Ahead – Wise Words Wednesday”

How Things Work Out…

How things work out

Sweet Home Alabama is hands down one of my favorite movies. No matter what mood I am in or how I am feeling, it makes me feel better. One of the scenes that I can never miss is the one with Melanie and Jake in the coondog cemetery.

When Melanie wipes her eyes, sniffs and says, “It’s funny how things don’t work out,” Jake smile and replies, “It’s funny how they do,” my heart flutters and my mood soars.

I don’t care who you are. There HAS to be a time when this statement was true for you.

There are many experiences in my life that I never would have imagined turning out the ways they did, but each one had its own way of working out.

Whatever you are facing today, I encourage you to remember there is joy in the optimism that all situations have a way of working out.

Tough choices, challenging changes, heartbreak, illness, or seeking purpose are all means to a new beginning. Don’t let the tears and sniffles outnumber your dreams and hopes. Don’t dwell on how funny it is that some things don’t work out. Rejoice in the fact that they will.

By: Melanie A. Peters

P.S. My heart also flutters when she says, “So I can kiss you any time I want.”

Explaining Dr. King to My Children

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My two older kiddos have read the I Am Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. book and have had numerous lessons about the way he changed the world, but my 5-year-old had some questions about why he didn’t go to school today.

mlk jr

A terrific book on the life and times of Dr. King

The simple answer was we didn’t go to school today because we are remembering and honoring the life of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

His question in return, “Why?”

Well, where do I start?

I told my son about how African-Americans were not treated equally in America and how Martin Luther King Jr. was a smart and kind man, who tried to get people to work together so that everyone was treated equally. He wanted his children to grow up to have the opportunities all others had. He didn’t want people to have to live in fear of being beaten or left out because of how they looked. Dr. King preached about how peace could and would bring about change if only everyone would open their hearts to its healing powers. He asked people to respond with kindness and understanding instead of anger and hitting. His ideas gave us wonderful guidance as to the ways we should treat one another and resolve our issues.

“Oh, okay,” was my son’s simple reply.

Later my two older kiddos were fighting and my youngest son yelled, “Hey, we are out of school because Marting Luther King says we have to stop fighting! So stop fighting” Continue reading “Explaining Dr. King to My Children”