Sometimes We Just Don’t Have the Words

No Words

In tough situations we often find ourselves unable to come up with the right words to say. That inability makes handling the circumstances even tougher. Here’s the good news: sometimes nothing needs to be said.

Just showing up and offering to listen or hug those hurting in the situation can be the most perfect proclamation. A simple squeeze of the hand or a covered dish for supper can sound like the kindest statements. Handing someone a tissue or taking over childcare duties is a true testament to your support and understanding for the suffering they are enduring. Sometimes we just don’t have the words, but we do always have the ability to make things happen and ease pain of the circumstances.

When my grandfather died, I was unable to attend the funeral because I had just endured a major surgery. My aunt came and sat with me the day of his funeral and said nothing. She simply hugged me, made lunch, did the dishes, and took care of the laundry. She knew I didn’t could speak of my grief yet and understood that sometimes it isn’t the words that make us feel better.

Sometimes we just don’t have the words.

Last night I attended the visitation of a man I had never met. I attended because two of his daughters (Mary Kay and Tina) are friends of mine. As I approached the front of the line, I wondered (as most do): what can I say that will help? Continue reading “Sometimes We Just Don’t Have the Words”

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Experimental Cleaning

 

Experimental Birthday GiftLast year my uncle let me borrow his robot vacuum cleaner for my birthday. The intention behind this gift was to see if I would like one for myself. The experiment went well.

For Christmas, I received my very own robot vacuum. Now we are onto a new experiment in convenience and cleaning.

The subject of our experiment is Roomee.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1_QYuSC76Ns5K6lML8zzTIuWtZ9D8JVp_/view?usp=sharing

Roomee is the vaccum’s name and she is very popular at our house. Everyone fights over who gets to push her buttons. All too often I find myself saying, “Stay away from the vacuum!” (Words I never thought I would utter.)

In the time we have had Roomee, I can honestly say she has been helpful. As with any experiment, there have been a few hang ups (mainly with Roomee getting hung up on my kids’ clothes that hide under their beds), but for the most part adding her to our family has been beneficial.

I really like how she picks up around the table and under the counter in the kitchen. The freshly vacuumed carpets in the living room and bedrooms make me feel like Martha Stewart. Having a debris-free rug by the front door makes me a homemaker rock star.

I know what you are thinking, “Where is the experiment?”

The experiment comes in the same form as any other scientific method.

Hypothesis: If I have a robot vacuum cleaner, my floors will be clean. Continue reading “Experimental Cleaning”

Intentergy Turned 2

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On February 14th I celebrated the 2nd Anniversary of Intentergy.

While the last few weeks things have been quiet on the site, my writing has been anything but silent.

My family took a terrific trip that has no fewer than 15 posts in draft. My students continue to provide me with love, learning, and laughter that I promise to share. As always the farm has me on high alert for lessons that can only come from caring for livestock and the land.

To celebrate my 2nd blogging anniversary, I would like to share links to some of my favorite posts from the past.

curve ball (2)Curve Balls – A story inspired by the curve pitch and how to handle the figurative curve balls in our lives.

Zone Defense for Your Attitude – Today, if you find yourself crowded by grumpiness or fouled by foulness of others, put up your positivity defenses.

For the Love of the Game – A post inspired by my father’s practice of watching games without sound. Sometimes the quiet allows us to know what is really going on in life.

Angelfood Cake – A Tradition of Grace – A story inspired by our parish dinner. The angel food cakes I bake are not in my honor but in honor of Miss Grace Jansen.

Not just a pieWhy is it Easy as Pie? Pies are Hard. – Another story inspired by parish picnics reminding us that effort can lead to tasty rewards.

Emergency Room Enlightenment – A visit to our local emergency room helped me to see that it really is a small world and my efforts as a writer were helpful to others.

You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out – I really don’t have life figured out. None of us do. This was a reminder that we don’t have to have it all figured out.

The OTHER Serenity Prayer – A tribute to a modified version of my favorite prayer

29 gifts and meMeeting Cami Walker – Taking the 29 Gifts Challenge – After reading 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life, I was inspired to start my blog and have since had the chance to become friends with its author Cami Walker.

Signs of Faith – Visiting the local ambulance district served to provide an very important reminder about those who serve our communities.

No Bull - communicateCommunication is Important – No Bull! A story inspired by the purchase of some Charolais cattle by my husband that led to a breach in the happiness of our home. (Happiness was definitely restored and the cattle are enjoying their role on our farm.)

Overalls and a Pocket Watch –The story of remembering my Grandfather and his special things that left their mark on my heart.Grandpa Frank

By: Melanie A. Peters

P.S. Intentergy is energy with a positive purpose. I hope you will put energy into being positive today.

P.P.S. Thank you to everyone who has read, commented, or shared my blog during the last two years. Your support has made all the difference.

 

Signs of Faith

sign of faith

Recently I had the opportunity to visit our local ambulance district headquarters with my daughter’s Girl Scout troop. It was a terrific experience.

The girls were able to see all of the equipment and try out some of the life-saving gear used by the ambulance personnel.  Dana, our guide, took time to show and explain each part of the ambulance district offices, garage, training rooms, and living quarters. The sign in the picture above was hanging in the living room.

This sign was probably one of the greatest examples I have ever encountered of what faith truly is. The reality of what those medics and responders face daily struck me with tremendous force as I read and re-read those words, “Faith makes things possible, not easy…”

“Faith makes things possible, not easy…”

How many times have I found myself trying to reassure a student that I had faith in them?

Rarely did they realize my faith was in their ability to be successful at a task, not in the ability for the task to be done without some effort. Oh how I wish these words were in my teaching vernacular for the last decade!

What about all those times when I prayed for help with making a huge decision? Continue reading “Signs of Faith”

Because of the Common, Ordinary People… – Wise Words Wednesday

Because of the common ordinary

Those who choose to serve our nation are anything but common or ordinary, but in his Veteran’s Day address to his children’s school, First Sergeant Curtis Brandt shared the powerful impacts that have resulted from the efforts of those who were doing what they considered common and ordinary.

During his 18 years of serving in the Missouri National Guard, Curtis has worked to protect and enhance the lives of individuals here on American soil and in Iraq, Afghanistan, Guatemala, Panama, Germany, Kuwait and Qatar. While on his missions to help those in need and protecting those who could not protect themselves, First Sergeant Brandt has missed many moments with his children, such as first steps and first toothy grins, and faced his son not knowing who he was after a year of deployment. There does not seem to be anything “common” or “ordinary” about giving up the ability to witness defining moments in the life of one’s child.

In his speech Curtis encouraged the students to be aware of how many veterans were sitting with them at that prayer service. His message was engaging and inspired those there to be thankful for and mindful of those who serve and have served in our military. He reminded them that our nation was not always one that enjoyed liberty, or lived with the rights of speech and religion, and was not always able to provide protection from prejudice. The students were challenged to find ways to thank veterans and their own means for keeping our country united. Continue reading “Because of the Common, Ordinary People… – Wise Words Wednesday”

Sometimes the Fear Won’t Go Away. Do It Anyway. – Wise Words Wednesday

Somes the fear doesn't go away

via Daily Prompt: Brave 

Sometimes the fear won’t go away, so you’ll have to do it afraid.

As a matter of habit, I don’t watch the news. My husband does though, so the news is on EVERY morning. We start our day catching up on the shootings, bombings, trash-talk Tweets, and the generally tragic state of our world.

I would much rather start the day by watching something like “Friends” or “I Love Lucy,” but hubby would remind me that it is important to know what’s going on in the world and then change the channel.

The story that has been most bothersome to me lately is the one of the four soldiers killed in Niger on October 4th. Victims of an apparent ambush, these men died serving our nation and world as they worked to stop ISIS.

As they served, those men knew that there was much to fear. Their service was intended to assist in ending the evil of ISIS. They were most surely afraid, but their actions reflected the definition of bravery.

If men can face the terror of forces, such as ISIS, can’t we take on horrible happenings on our own fronts? Continue reading “Sometimes the Fear Won’t Go Away. Do It Anyway. – Wise Words Wednesday”

Pig Play: Driven by Emotion, Inspired by Tears

Pig PlayPig Play: Driven by Emotion, Inspired by Tears
Guest Post by Wade Orscheln

In the last few days I have been inspired not by a paid motivational speaker, not by my boss, not by a famous person or athlete, not even by an adult, but by the great youth we have in agriculture.  The last few days I have found myself running back and forth from home to Sedalia trying to watch my FFA students exhibit their livestock at the Missouri State Fair. Which reminds me that I must thank my principal for letting me out of those beginning of the year teacher meetings so I could attend these shows.  These kids give me hope in our future.  They showed me a passion and drive I thought that had been lost in our American youth.

Maybe I’m becoming soft with age, but several times during the youth swine show I found myself drying my eyes.  I got to witness a blind young man with the help of a friend who served as his eyes exhibit the 4-H reserve champion barrow.  I watched as his friend embraced him with a big hug.  The smile on his face and the tears in the eyes of the crowd was priceless.  I just wish for a moment he could visually see how great his duroc barrow really was.  I wish he knew how motivational he was.  He didn’t just show the 4-H reserve champion barrow but showed the world that a disability doesn’t have to disable.

I got the opportunity to listen to a judge speak before selecting the youth show overall champion barrow. He spoke about, that what was going on in the swine barn that day wasn’t about the livestock at all, that it was about the kids in the show ring.  After his speech I witnessed a young man get the slap that every livestock exhibitor dreams of.  That slap that the judge gives your animal when choosing the grand champion. Instantly the young man wrapped his arms around the judge and broke into tears. These tears were tears of joy and passion. Continue reading “Pig Play: Driven by Emotion, Inspired by Tears”

4-H – Showing Us the Future

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Ravyn showing in the ring.

It’s county fair season and the 4-H kiddos are showing us the future leaders and providers for our communities. My husband grew up showing hogs and cattle in the 4-H livestock shows and selling them at the auction to raise money for his future farming endeavors. It has clearly worked out, as we now have over 200 head of cattle and raise thousands of turkeys every year.

We are proud  and excited to support the 4-H tradition. Our county fair is held the weekend after 4th of July each year. It is always HOT and it always rains at least once. The 4-H Livestock show and other competitions are held on the first day of the fair. Starting at 7:00 a.m. members put a year’s worth of hard work on display.

Support 4H (5)

Kila showing her hog.

4-H members show steers, hogs, sheep, and poultry. Some show their workmanship in competitions for sewing, arts and crafts, photography, painting, pottery, woodworking, metal working, gardening, and other trades. Ribbons are awarded based on the successfulness of their projects and showmanship. Blue ribbons continue to be the coveted prize of choice. In the livestock show, presenters hope to be crowned Grand Champion. The Grand Champion is the choicest animal in the competition and usually brings the highest price.

Those that earn blue ribbons in the non-livestock competitions have the opportunity to move on to competition at the State fair. It is quite an honor.

Showing a fair animal starts a year in advance. The animals are selected when they are young so that the presenter has plenty of time to feed, care, and train the animal for showing. These fair animals become a part of the 4-H member’s family (almost), as they are a daily part of the presenter’s life. This is a powerful practice for developing future farmers and a strong understanding of dedication and hard work. After feeding, grooming, and practicing showing, the presenters often send out or deliver invitations to people in the community inviting them to bid on their animal. It is a terrific lesson in marketing and confidence for these young people. As the animals are judged, the livestock judges explain to the exhibitors and audience the qualities of a champion animal. (It’s a livestock learning experience for everyone.) Continue reading “4-H – Showing Us the Future”

A New Sheriff in Town – Defining What the Position Means

New Sheriff in Town

I have been doing a lot of thinking about lessons learned and it has been harder than I thought because I had done my homework on the issues and/or problems. I gathered data and information for a couple of years and set a course of direction to move the agency forward.

PastorSheriff_3_t_w600_h475.jpgLessons learned – “means an event or events that were not anticipated or a plan that failed for some reason unknown and you learn the hard way.” (Mike Bonham’s personal definition)

I think that, personally, I have a lot of goals for this agency and it seems to be taking too long, but in reality we are on track. I believe that this is in part because I really want the citizens of the county to be proud of their Sheriff’s Office, but the focus should not be ME, it should be the OFFICE as a whole.

png 1 Lesson one – People try to make it about the Sheriff. And I get it; I’m looked at as the leader. (Still hard) 

png 1 Lesson two—I push hard, the employees and myself to move to perfection and to hit the goals that have been established… (Slow down we will get there.)  

png 1 Lesson Three—With so many projects and initiatives, some can get lost in the push. My hope in is having a handle on prioritizing:

  1. Health and Welfare of the employees
  2. Biggest impact on safety and security for the citizens of the county.
  3. Keep spending within Sheriff’s Office Budget

 

Like I said, this has been a lot tougher assignment than I thought it would be. Thanks for the challenge.

The following I released after a 60 day review:  My hope is you can see the consistence and planning.

Bonham 1.jpgI took office in December, this week and we reviewed the first 60 days on the job.
We wanted a “no drama” transition from the leadership of Carl Fowler, who served as interim sheriff.
We Intensified communication — internally and externally — as we have marked the first 60 days.
We have used Facebook, and a soon an updated website, YouTube videos to push information. We credited the media blitz with leading to the arrest of a fugitives, as a direct results.
“We’re looking for ways to distribute information. It’s a work in progress.”
We have stepped up efforts to arrest dealers, save users who overdose and educate the community.
But, my office has yet to engage the medical community in an effort to reduce abuse of prescription narcotics.

What’s to come:

• Crisis Intervention Training:  to prepare all deputies and staff with intervention methods for dealing with citizens suffering from mental illness crisis. Three staffers will complete the 40-hour training, scheduled in May.

• Increased community outreach with a town hall meeting in Linn and other events. The restructured Community Services Unit , the chaplain program, and the Jr. Deputy program.

• Restarting the “Reserve deputy” program, which allows retired law enforcement officers to volunteer. They must have the same training as full-time officers and can work in a range of activities.

“I’m just pleased to report that we’ve hit the marks on our first 60-day plan. “This is not to say we’re done.”
It is the staff that have been working quickly and professionally to meet my expectation. Turnover has remained low, with only minimum changes — retirements and resignations — since I took office.

“The deputies and men and women of the sheriff’s office have been working hard and I’m proud of these accomplishments. We will continue to work hard to produce a professional, competent and compassionate law enforcement agency the citizens of Osage County can be proud of.”

By: Sheriff Mike Bonham

Guest post for 2017 Lessons Learned in the Last Year Intentergy series.

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Osage County Fair 2016

 

P.S. Last July my children met Sheriff Bonham at the county fair, when he was still running for office. After he shook my five year old’s hand, my son asked, “Why does he want to be the sheriff?” I told him, “Mr. Bonham wants to keep us safe.” My son’s reply, “Okay, I guess we can vote for him.” 🙂  Sheriff Bonham has worked hard to keep lines of communication open with people of our county and safety in the forefront of his tenure. Thank you, Sheriff Bonham, for your willingness to share your personal lessons learned this year. Best of luck to you as you continue to meet these goals and protect our community.

Respect, Service, Honor, and Questionable Cocktails – After a year of answering the call to serve

Respect Service Honor and Questionable Cocktails

Over the course of this last year, I learned a lot.  It was my first year out of high school and I didn’t know what to expect.  I shipped out to One Station Unit Training in August of 2016, to become a Military Police Officer for the Missouri National Guard.  Those twenty weeks were the longest, and most educational, weeks of my life so far.

The first nine weeks I learned to be a soldier.  I learned how to work as a team, how to properly maintain a weapon system, and how to be as efficient as I can be.  Red Phase, the initial three weeks of training, where you learn how to operate on minimal sleep and to look out for each other.  Red Phase is about tearing down the individual, removing that “it’s all about me” attitude.  Clayton 2I didn’t learn a lot in Red Phase, however, White Phase is where I learned that working together and having others’ backs is the best and most efficient way to get a task done.  While the training portion of White Phase is all about marksmanship, it’s where the whole idea of being a team player set in, for me at least.

When someone screws up, everyone is punished.  We would ask why we would have to do push-ups, or more commonly flutter kicks, when Private Joe was the one who fell asleep.  It was because we didn’t keep him in check, we didn’t wake him up.

Continue reading “Respect, Service, Honor, and Questionable Cocktails – After a year of answering the call to serve”