When we think of people going mad, the mental images of their insanity can manifest in a million different ways.
We might picture the tortured soul giggling, huddled in a corner, with eyes devoid of coherent thought. We could envision someone enraged and mercilessly searching for their next victim to mutilate. And sometimes, we imagine them simply closing in on themselves, shutting out the world, and stowing away any of the traits that made them “normal.”
Well, my internal monologue went mad this past weekend.
It’s not the first, and I’m certain, it won’t be the last time this happens, but my inner voice took a long walk off the short pier of reason.
After three weeks of battling a sinus infection that morphed into bronchitis and then into a “touch” of pneumonia, I was already feeling pretty run down. After being told, “You should be better” and “It’s been three weeks. You think you’d be over it,” by two people that I love, I felt even worse.
As the day wore on, I found myself home alone. In my efforts to be a valuable member of our home and society, I did some dishes. As I scrubbed the dishes, the dark thoughts kept washing over me.
“Do they think I enjoy not being able to breathe?”
“It might just be better if I DID stop breathing.”
“Seriously, if I just gave up, at least my coughing and nose-blowing wouldn’t annoy them anymore.”
The thoughts went on and on. The dishes got done. The floor got swept. I was out of breath, depleted of energy, and maybe just a little bit angry.
In order to maintain my status as “Meanest Mom Ever,” I assign chores to my children. One of the most frequent tasks assigned is that of unloading and reloading the dishwasher. In response to their frequent whining about the task, I, in true “seven miles up hill, both ways, in the snow” fashion, sadly lament that I didn’t have a dishwasher growing up.
If grumbling continues, I remind them of when our last dishwasher died and we went weeks without one. To emphasize the experience, I will start filling the sink with hot, soapy water and invite them to go ahead and wash the dirty dishes by hand. I encourage them to dry those dishes AND put them away, IF they can’t find the energy to take care of the fully functional dishwasher. (It’s child abuse at its finest.)
The other day, I found myself in need of one of these “Don’t forget you’ve got it” reminders as well. Everywhere I walked in my house, I noticed things begging for my attention. Too much laundry to fold, too many floors in need of sweeping, too much mail to sort, and more sticky notes with stuff to do than I could muster the strength to tackle. It was truly a first-world crisis.
To distract myself from the despair of too much to do, I did what any normal human would do. I chose to scroll through Facebook. One of the very first posts that popped up in my feed was from Ms. Sunshine. I love her posts because they are always short, sweet, and uplifting. That particular day, her message was a bullseye to my heart, reminding me that I had way too much to be grateful for.
Each and every day, we have blessings and burdens laid at our feet. Their significance is determined by how much power we give them through our actions and intentions. Do we remember to go heavy on the thanks, or do we overload our focus with our problems?
I felt like someone turned on the hot, soapy water in the sink for me and said, “Are you gonna clean your attitude up the hard way? Or are you going to take full advantage of your abilities to make a difference?”
After sharing Ms. Sunshine’s post, I put down my mind-zapping, cellular device and got back to getting things done. Later that night (after my attitude and house were cleaner), I revisited my Facebook feed and was pleasantly surprised to see how many of my friends “liked” and shared the Ms. Sunshine post.
Maybe they all needed a “Don’t forget you’ve got it” reminder, too, or maybe their purpose for the day was to broadcast that reminder to others. Any which way, gratitude got some attention, and attitudes got some adjusting.
Here’s your Intentergy positive purpose for today: Go heavy on the “Thank you, God, for everything” and remember that you have an abundance of tasks, chores, and opportunities available to dedicate some energy towards. You’ve got so much going for you that the possibilities may seem overwhelming. There are tons of people out there cheering for you. The world is full of resources, energy, education, and joy. The key is: Don’t forget you’ve got it all at your disposal.
By: Melanie A. Peters
P.S. No children or dishes were harmed in the unloading or reloading of the dishwasher, and a little hand washing won’t hurt anyone.
P.P.S. At least we have running water and soap to clean the plates that had been covered in healthy, delicious food.
In this world, there are all kinds of people, but it recently occurred to me that there seem to be two types of wishers among the throngs of earthly inhabitants. Some wish for the unknown, while others wish for what they know to be comfortable. On the trip of a lifetime, Hubby and I had the opportunity to hike in Juneau, Alaska, with friends. It was AMAZING!
As we trekked 5 miles into the Alaskan forest, one of the natural occurrences that our guide pointed out was that many trees had fallen along the path, completely revealing their roots because the soil is so shallow.
The fragility of the trees’ stability was fascinating because the tree roots where we live rarely come out of their deeply embedded homes without the help of a tornado or bulldozer.
Despite their seemingly easy downfall, the Alaskan trees managed to keep their roots together.
I don’t think I would be able to hold all my facets from flailing in every direction if I toppled in such a massive fashion.
As we made our descent, my gal pal and I marveled at how lucky we were to witness the Alaskan beauty and how hard it was to wrap our brains around just how massive the wilderness is. Walking arm-in-arm, we were in rapture.
My sweet friend, being the magical wish-maker that she is, said, “The only thing that would make this hike more perfect is if Sasquatch walked across the trail in front of us.”
Do piles seem to produce at an alarmingly fast pace in your workspace? Do you sometimes look at your desk, kitchen, or closet and think, “Where did all this come from?”
Well, you, my friend, are in luck!
Your piles present you with the distinct privilege of being someone who can move mountains. Those mounds of miscellaneous papers, projects, and housework are your key to making things happen. You have fertile fields of clutter.
Albert Einstein is often referenced in discussions about cluttered desks due to his quandary about the relationship between empty desks and empty minds. I have always embraced this sentiment when surveying the insanity of my office; however, Anne Lamott helped me to appreciate my cluttered chaos in a new way when I read her book, Bird by Bird.
“Clutter is wonderfully fertile ground – you can still discover new treasures under all those piles, clean things up, edit things out, find things, get a grip.” – Anne Lamott
What do you do when your buddy Timmy gives you four 5-gallon buckets of jalapeños? You get creative with jalapeño.
Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth, Hubby took Timmy up on the offer to pick some peppers, cucumbers, zucchini, and squash from his massive garden late this past summer. I was excited about the fresh produce and eager to give at least one new recipe a try. Little did I know I would soon be up to my eyeballs in stems, seeds, and researching ways to preserve the plentiful peppers.
Each day I spent 2 hours slicing and seeding peppers by hand for the first two or three days. These carefully crafted slices went into pickled jalapeños. Of course, I wore gloves to protect my skin from the spicy juices but my hands and wrists started to get a little worn out by Day 3. I pulled out my little Pampered Chef food processor and started blending away at the buckets of peppers, but didn’t make much headway because of the blender’s small capacity. Plus, I had moved on to trying a second new recipe. This time I was attempting to make jalapeño relish, and we weren’t too sure if we would like it or use it much. (*We did like it. ** We used it a lot.)
Hubby asked why I didn’t have a bigger blender. I told him because Santa hadn’t brought it yet. Well, Santa came in August with a fancyshmancy, BIG blender. It was going to be perfect for peppers, zucchini, slaw, all the things…. but it was really BIG. The jalapenos were plentiful but petite. This is when we really had to shake things up with how we sliced our peppers.
We all know about the proverbial plates in our lives. Plates that are always full of responsibilities, expectations, and commitments. With Thanksgiving tomorrow, I guess our proverbial and physical plates are about to be or have been overflowing with good stuff, stressful stuff, and stuff we really don’t need.
This morning was jam-packed with rushing to try to make all my plans fit into a time frame that probably wasn’t feasible. The harder I tried and the faster I rushed, the fuller I felt with frustration.
I heard a voice ask what I was “so darn upset about.”(It may have sounded like my husband.) I wasn’t sure why I had tears in my eyes and a burning at the back of my throat that only happens when I cry. I guess it felt like crying would take away some of what was weighing on me. But crying wasn’t going to help anything, and it sure wasn’t going to clear my proverbial plate from all my commitments.
It is the year 2022, and I aspire to be Jane Jetson 40 years in advance. I say 40 years in advance because The Jetsons portrayed society in the year 2062. My aspirations to be Jane Jetson most likely stem from laziness or exhaustion (not sure which), but I can tell you that my robot vacuum lacks the personality of Rosie Jetson and my wardrobe has far fewer digital options than Jane’s.
I can only imagine what it would be like to press a button and a fully fresh face and hair style would materialize. Forget the frustration of not having anything to wear, I could just step into my holographic closet apparatus and create my perfect look by swiping through the digital designs. My dishes would wash themselves, food prepare itself, and the laundry would wash, dry, and fold all on its own. It would be magical.
Maybe it’s her cool triangle-shaped collar, or her ability to juggle all the galactic challenges of being a woman of the future, but I know that I would love to put myself in her spacetastic shoes. Clearly, Jane is a woman who knows how to handle her bumbling husband, reign in her teenage daughter, keep her brilliant son from getting too big for his britches, and maintain a social life and philanthropic endeavors through her work with the Skypad Apartments’ recycling company and Galaxy Women Historical Society. Who wouldn’t want to be like Jane Jetson?
As I made my way around the corner, light from our basement stairwell startled me. My children are notorious for leaving on the lights throughout the house, but this time I was the only one awake and certain that I had turned off all lights before going to bed the night before. The glare from the stairs was unexpected and demanded investigation.
I made my way down the steps, and as I reached the bottom landing, I had to smile. The radiant light was shining through the artwork completed a year ago on our basement windows. The sun had not shone in a few days and its rays were something I really needed and appreciated in that quiet moment.
The windows found in my home and those around the globe, may not have held a candle to the ones found in our parish churches, but they allowed a creative light to shine in our hearts and homes last spring. In the throws of pandemic quarantine, I sought ways to bring joy and creativity to my children’s activities. As Easter approached and the weather kept us indoors, I joined thousands of other parents giving kids permission to paint their windows. Using tempera paint we created “stained glass” windows.
March 2020 – My kiddos creating “stained glass” windows.
At the time, this was a fun and uplifting experience. Now, the fear and anxiety that came with the haunting pandemic are lessened and the pressures of what to do with ourselves in those uncertain times have diminished, but the artwork on our windows is still there brightening our days.
I could wash the windows and take down the reminder of what COVID 19 did to our lives last spring, but keeping the color on those panes has also been a positive prompt encouraging us to keep faith in spite of fear and that things will improve if we find ways to stay optimistic. It is in the light of last year that we can feel pride in our resourcefulness and gratitude for what we have accomplished and the continued blessings of our lives. So if you are feeling down or there is a darkness hanging over you, please know that there is light at the end of every tunnel and even the most stained of windows have the ability to let brightness shine in you.
By: Melanie A. Peters
P.S. Washing windows is a sad subject because washing windows makes me sad. Please don’t ask me to was these windows. 🙂
This may seem like an unusual question, but in the grand scheme of things there isn’t a chore or task that we don’t relate with someone else. While I mop, I am usually mentally cussing my family for being so messy, but before the floor is dry I almost always think of Mary Scott.
Who is Mary Scott?
Well, Mary was a shift manager at the Dairy Queen where I worked as a teenager.
Mary was a tough manager because she did not appreciate horseplay, slacking off, or sneaking bites of cookie dough toppings that weren’t paid for. She appreciated a job well done and sought to provide quality customer service to each customer that came through the door. She also really liked making the Blizzards thick enough to turn upside down each time one was ordered.
Many of my co-workers did not like the job of cleaning the dinning room at the end of the night. I didn’t mind it because it was easier to get clean than the hamburger grease in the kitchen. Sweeping, wiping down tables and doors, bathroom supply checks, and mopping the floor were easy enough tasks to get done so I could get out of there at the end of my shift. One night, Mary watched me mop around the last tables and the floor in front of the soda fountains. I asked if everything was okay. She smiled and said she really liked when I or my sister closed the front because it would be done right. “You girls know how to work. That’s for sure,” she added.
I don’t know why her words have stuck with me, but each time I lug a mop and bucket to clean a floor, I remember the pride I felt in her compliment. Her words also inspired me to always do the best job I could. I wanted to be the person who did a job right. Sometimes I was tempted to cut corners in my cleaning, like my colleagues having water fights in the back, but Mary’s words always caused me to be someone she could count on.
Being overwhelmed is a constant state for most of us. The list of to-do’s can never seem to get to-done, and distractions know no limits. Being a list-maker can help, but some of us have a tendency to either make too many lists or put so much on our agendas that it’s not feasible to finish any of it.
At a coffee date with Maddy Hoeltke-Brown, we talked about the unconventional way we are approaching life with our side hustles and how the 8-to-5 scene is not the career path we have followed. Even thought we’ve chosen different paths, Maddy is just getting started in her business ventures, while I’m trying to evolve with mine. She asked if I had any advice to help with her whirlwind of distractions as she tries to get a good focus on building her graphic design business.
First of all, I do not profess to be a guru in business and my blog and writing career are just getting going, but I know a little something about helping people pave paths to success from my experiences on the farm and in the classroom.
To get started, I shared Lysa TerKeurst’s story of dedicating time to her desired work. In her book, The Best Yes, Lysa talked about making the decision to take her writing seriously and scheduled time on her calendar to do just that. TerKeurst reflected the first time she had to turn down a lunch date because she had scheduled time to write. The act of saying no to someone, because she chose time for her own goals, made her feel guilty at first. Eventually, Lysa found that giving herself time to do what she needed to be successful was the ultimate route for making her goals realities. I advised Maddy to do the same. Each week I plan time to write and most weeks I am successful, but I also realize that life throws priorities in my way and I have to compromise to keep the big picture moving forward. That realization led to my second piece of advice.
Intentergy 