Tag Wise Words

Turn Right at the Instinct – Wise Words Wednesday

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Turn Right at the Instinct – Wise Words Wednesday via Daily Prompt: Instinct

The Right Instinct

I have learned a lot in my life from Lady O.

  1. Wear pretty underwear when you are feeling ugly. (A lesson learned on a sick day watching Oprah Winfrey Show when I was in high school)

    Oprah

    Photo credit: Google Images

  2. Multitasking is hard on our brains. We must condition our brains to identify priorities. (Another Oprah Winfrey Show tidbit)
  3. Alice Walker, author of The Color Purple, is a master of literature. (Because of this lesson, I have taught Walker’s story “Everyday Use” for the last 10 years.)
  4. “If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it. That is the lesson, and that lesson alone will save you a lot of grief.”

 

Recently I read a post on stranger danger and how children’s discomfort around adults, even familiar adults, should be respected and acknowledged. There is something to this discontent that we should regard.

When someone unfamiliar calls you and their tone sets off alarm bells in the back of your brain, it is okay to put your responses on hold until they have established themselves as someone who is trustworthy.

Great deals or special values are not always so “special.” If you believe a “deal” to be too good to be true. Your honesty meter is going off and you should probably step away from the “deal” until you can find the real value in it.

Many of life’s opportunities require us to go with our gut. Letting our instincts inspire us is integral to making life changing choices.  Continue reading “Turn Right at the Instinct – Wise Words Wednesday” →

Make Life Work – Wise Words Wednesday

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Make Life Work – Wise Words Wednesday

make-life-work

This sassy little quote was found on Pinterest. I like it.

While I write about positive energy and intent everyday, it is extremely necessary for me to also practice flexibility, consideration, and acceptance of imperfection.

The pursuits of happiness and perfection are often considered to be connected, but in all actuality, perfection prevents us from being happy because we are too worried about becoming imperfect.

In reading This I Believe, Andrew Sullivan’s philosophy outlined the pursuit of happiness as such, “I believe in the struggle to remake ourselves and challenge each other in spirit of eternal forgiveness, in the awareness that none of us knows for sure what happiness truly is, but each of us knows the imperative to keep searching. I believe in the possibility of surprising joy, of serenity through pain, and of homecoming through exile” (Allison, 233).

Life isn’t ever going to be perfect. We have to make it work through the joy, pain, and homecomings. We can never stop seeking what it is to be happy or to assist others in finding joy. Our own self-definition is never complete. We have to work to keep the surprises from throwing us too far off our intended course. And we have to maintain diligence through the challenges and imperfections of life.

It won’t be easy, but we can make it work……life, that is.

We must put LIFE to work each day. Allow the challenges and choices of each moment define a successful and fruitful existence. Direct your energy and intent in ways that lighten the loads of your imperfections and chaos. It’s never going to be perfect. Make it work.

Perfect your own personal style for living life to the fullest, and you won’t ever have to worry about living the perfect life. It will just work.

By: Melanie A. Peters

P.S. I am totally ok with not being perfect, but I still try really hard sometimes. I just do. Oh well, I guess I will keep working at it. Nobody’s perfect, right?

Sources: Allison, Jay, et al. This I Believe: the Personal Philosophies of Remarkable Women and Men. New York, Henry Holt, 2006.

The Creative Power of the Unknown – Wise Words Wednesday

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The Creative Power of the Unknown – Wise Words Wednesday

creative-power-of-the-unknown

The personal philosophies found in the This I Believe collection continue to amaze me. One that stood out to me in particular this week came from astrophysicist Alan Lightman.

In his personal philosophy he wrote, “I hope that there are always things we don’t know about the physical world as well as about ourselves. I believe in the creative power of the unknown. I believe in the boundary of standing between the known and the unknown. I believe in the unanswered questions of children” (Allison, 149).

Our brains are so overworked with the little details of everyday survival that we forget to hold onto the magic of wonder. We limit our boundaries for growth.

I love when my children ask me questions that stump me. Those questions demonstrate the tremendous potential my children have for understanding and intelligence. It also reminds me that it’s ok to not be a know-it-all. We always have something to learn about our world or ourselves.

As you embark on your schedule-driven journey this week, leave a little room to learn and explore things that are new or unknown to you. Provide creative energy to your conversations and introductions. Allow the unknown to extend into your personal motivation. Continue reading “The Creative Power of the Unknown – Wise Words Wednesday” →

The Right to be Wrong – Wise Words Wednesday

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The Right to be Wrong – Wise Words Wednesday

the-right-to-be-wrong

“I believe that man’ noblest endowment is his capacity to change. Armed with reason, he can see two sides and choose: He can be divinely wrong. I believe in a man’s right to be wrong.” – Leonard Bernstein

This I Believe is a collection of personal philosophies. I am currently reading it and LOVE what I am reading. The history of This I Believe dates back to the 1950’s. The original This I Believe series asked individuals to write their philosophy and then share it on the radio. It was a huge sensation.

As I pour through the philosophies of tremendous individuals, both from the 1950’s and present, I am moved by the similar themes that continue to surface. Kindness, compassion, intelligence, and faith are key elements in all of the entries. Each of these traits requires us to grow and change. Our wrong choices set us up for opportunities to do just that. Grow. Learn. Change. Become better people.

As you encounter the mistakes of others and yourself, remember the right to be wrong is guaranteed to everyone. We cannot develop deeper understanding in our lives, if we don’t discover what works and what doesn’t.

Being wrong is different than being bad. Continue reading “The Right to be Wrong – Wise Words Wednesday” →

Fear of Thinking

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Fear of Thinking

the-fear-of-thinking

Maybe it’s the age of instant information that has set us back in our ability to devise free thought. Perhaps it is the scariness of standing out from our crowd that has stopped our willingness to speak about original thought. Political correctness is always putting us in our place and prevents us from perusing what our hearts know to be true.

Whatever it is, many people today are afraid to think for themselves.

Freedom of speech has become the accepted mode for trash talk and insults, but has lost its power to protect speech about what is morally acceptable.

The Constitution’s First Amendment was composed so that individuals have the right to speak of what they believe. Our current climate considers the sharing of beliefs to be an infringement on the rights of others, so please don’t speak of God or prayer. Don’t stand for the National Anthem. Whatever you do, don’t suggest that life isn’t always fair.

I do believe that all men and women are created in God’s image and that we all have innate goodness and value. It is so hurtful to our race (the human race) to see the derogatory speech and actions of those who don’t think they are being treated fairly. Vandalism, theft, and assault are, and never will be, means for acceptable expression. You can’t heal pain with hurtful actions. Continue reading “Fear of Thinking” →

How to Treat a Bad Day – Wise Words Wednesday

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How to Treat a Bad Day – Wise Words Wednesday

how-to-treat-a-bad-day

Bad days seem to be contagious. When you have one bad day, you seem to become a bad day magnet

Bad days stink.

It is easy to say, “Tomorrow is another day,” or “Cheer up. It could always be worse,” but we know those thoughts don’t defeat the dreariness in some cases. The best medicine for a case of the blues is to treat yourself though kindness or charity.

Doing something kind or generous can be the first step in kicking cloudy thoughts to the curb. Not only will your actions help someone else have a better day, but you will quickly find that your friendliness has the same infectious inclinations that the bad days bring. One kind act makes is a lot easier to motivate ourselves to feel accomplished and lovable.

If you aren’t going for the sweet, touchy, feely remedy, remember Mercutio’s crude advice for Romeo after Rosaline’s rejection in The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet. Mercutio roughly advised his friend, “If love is rough with you, be rough with love.” Mercutio’s advice wasn’t exactly dealing with how to treat a bad day, but we can adapt it to fit our treatment purposes. Continue reading “How to Treat a Bad Day – Wise Words Wednesday” →

Worry = More Work Than It’s Worth – Wise Words Wednesday

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Worry = More Work Than It’s Worth – Wise Words Wednesday

worry-double-the-suffering

Without fail I have found worry wrecking my mental health lately.

There is just too much to do, too many mistakes made, saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, buying a gift and finding that the recipient already has that item, or taking the wrong exit on a busy highway because my mind is on all the other decisions I need to make, ugh, it’s TOO MUCH!

Holidays = gift buying + party going + relative-induced guilt x all the other normal STUFF

Worry = more work than it’s worth

Don’t we already have enough to do?

Worrying just slows us down. Worry steers us in the wrong direction or keeps us from moving forward. Worry really is more work than it’s worth.

“Worrying means you suffer twice.”

Here are some ideas to help you bypass worry:

png 1   Make lists. Check off your successes.
png 1   Set goals. Do your victory dance when you’ve earned it.
png 1    Forgive yourself. Give thanks for the grace.
png 1    Forgive others. Revel in the release.
png 1    What ever you do, try not to worry.

We are only human.
We cannot do it all.
It is physically impossible to do it all correctly or in a way that makes everyone happy. Don’t let worry wear you out!

“Worrying means you suffer twice.” Continue reading “Worry = More Work Than It’s Worth – Wise Words Wednesday” →

Read + Know + Grow + Smarter = Stronger Voice

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Read + Know + Grow + Smarter = Stronger Voice

The More You Read.png

“The more you read, the more you know. The more you know, the smarter you grow. The smarter you grow, the stronger your voice when speaking your mind or making your choice.”

I memorized these words from a bookmark I found at the library when I was 12.

Whenever people tell me they don’t like to read, I recite this poem to them. Often they ask me to repeat it a few times and agree there is merit to my message, but they still don’t like to read.

I understand. There are ways of learning that don’t appeal to me either.

Reading books or references works can be cumbersome. Reading instructional texts can be torture. Reading something you are interested in can change your life.

Books like You are a BadAss (Jen Sincero) and 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life (Cami Walker) helped me to find my voice in creating my blog. In the Meantime (Iyanla Vanzant) got me past the greatest heartaches of my life. The Holy Bible is a centuries old guide of how humanity has time and again been called to serve God and one another. I find a lot of advice in its pages. Continue reading “Read + Know + Grow + Smarter = Stronger Voice” →

I Think I Can? – Wise Words Wednesday

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I Think I Can? – Wise Words Wednesday

I think I can.png

 

Today is August 10th. May 28th I injured my shoulder in a spectacular feet of parenting. I lifted my 3 year-old up to dunk on a 7 foot rim (like the big boys) and felt something pop in my shoulder. Again that was May 28th and today is August 10th.

By June 28th I decided my shoulder hurt enough to actually call a doctor. I had continued to tell myself, “I can get past this stupid shoulder pain. I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.” Well the pain had started waking me up at night and was shooting to my finger tips occasionally. Again, I thought, “I think I can work through this. I think I can tough it out. I think I can.” When I did see a doctor on June 30th, she lectured me on the importance of taking care of myself, gave me a cortisone shot, and directions to take it easy on my shoulder for a week or so. Again, “I think I can keep being super mom. I think I can keep farming. I think I can just rest my shoulder in the evenings.”

Two days after I received the cortisone shot my arm hurt so badly I didn’t even want to drive.  I iced it and took ibuprofen. Again, “I think I am tough enough to keep going. I think I can. I think I can?”

The pain did seem to diminish after a few days of reduced activity but, hey, life is busy and I thought I could just keep going. Pushing forward with daily activities I only stopped for surging pains and burning shocks in my shoulder. I think I can?

On July 10th I finally decided I should call the doctor back for a follow-up. Of course it would be a week before they could see me again and I already had stuff I thought I had to do during their first available appointment. I saw the good doctor again on August 2nd and she told me that an MRI was necessary and then we could talk about my options.

The MRI required me to have a driver. Really??? I thought I could drive myself after a simple MRI. I thought wrong.

They would not schedule me until I could assure them I would have a driver and would not even do the test if my driver was not with me. I really think I can do this by myself. (Wrong!)

Thank goodness my best friend said she would drive me, because after the tubular torture of the MRI and the nausea that ensued after the dye injection, I was definitely not thinking about driving.

The MRI showed two small tears in my shoulder. (I think I may have needed to get help sooner.) The immediate solution offered by the orthopedic doctor was surgery, but of course I didn’t think that was necessary. So we decided to give therapy a try. I think I can just treat this shoulder with some stretches and it will be good to go. I think I can!

Yesterday I met with a wonderful physical therapist. She asked me some wonderfully insightful questions and measured my mobility and pain levels with the movement. “I think I can. I think I can. I think I can get through this evaluation,” was all I could say in my mind. The therapist gave a weary look and said, “Your shoulder has hurt how long? Your pain is this bad? You don’t think you need surgery?”

I smiled sheepishly and shared my belief that I am a cowgirl and can get through any pain.

She informed me even cowgirls need their shoulders and biceps to work so therapy may not be the fix for my shoulder problems, but we would give it a try. I think I can?

So here is sit trying to type with ice on my shoulder and the firm belief that I think I can get through my shoulder injury and greater understanding that my thoughts really should have been, “I think I am smart enough to seek medical attention.” Or “I think I can fix this with a real doctor’s opinion.”

A lot of people out there are too proud to ask for help when they need it. They think they are weak, if they seek assistance when a problem arises.

Here is the lesson of today’s post: Always know that you can ask for help or support.

Pain is not something that you have to bear alone. Injuries, physical or emotional, need to be treated so that life can move forward in a positive and productive manner. Therapies exist so that we can heal and become stronger. Speaking from painful experience, I want to encourage others to go the doctor, seek a counselor, or talk to a loved one if you are in need of healing.

Put your intent into knowing you can get better. Use your energy to produce positive motivation. You can do it. I know you can!

By: Melanie A. Peters