Changing Someone

Changing Someone

When we begin to change someone,
the change is not always noticeable.
The changes rarely happen instantly
or make a huge racket.
An extra giggle in our laugh or a sweet curl at the corner of their mouth,
an higher hop in your step or a wider swing in their swag.

When we begin to change someone,
the change is not always noticeable.
An extra plate becomes a common setting next to yours.
Everyday the shoes by the door number a pair more.
Schedules shift.
Your circle of friends decreases, blends, expands.

When we begin to change someone,
the change is not always noticeable.
Lives start to melt into a schedule in sync.
Habits begin to form hand-in-hand with routine.
The dishes may start to make it to the sink;
the laundry may pile itself in the right places.

When we begin to change someone,
the change is not always noticeable.
When the changes start to make themselves known,
Those that have changed are not always happy with how they have grown.
The deviation from their norms can lead to bitterness.
They did not want to change, but they wanted to be with you. Continue reading “Changing Someone”

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Start Holiday De-Stressing Now

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Holiday StressSome evil person posted this Elf meme on their Facebook feed the other day and I wanted to unfriend them but they are related to me and I like them.

Unfriending people can add additional stress at the holidays, and this article is all about holiday de-stressing.

 

In keeping with the 12 Days of Christmas, I am proposing 12 Steps to De-stress for the Holidays:

Step 1: To begin take a deep cleansing breath.

Step 2: After you remember to start breathing again, I want you to say these words, “Happiness is the greatest gift I can give. A stressed out me does not make a holiday happy. I will not add unhappiness to my holidays.”

See. Don’t you feel better?

Step 3: Write down one gift you will give yourself. (This does not have to be a material thing.)

Step 4: Make a list of all the other people for whom you want and/or need to get gifts. (These do not have to be material things.)

Step 5: Make a calendar of all events you KNOW will absolutely be on your agenda.

Step 6: Repeat Steps 1 & 2.

Step 7: Establish a budget.

  • How much will you spend on each person?
  • How much do you plan to give to your church or charities?
  • How much should you plan to spend on extra party foods and drinks?
  • How much are your travel costs?

Add those costs up.

Step 8: Repeat Steps 1 & 2. Continue reading “Start Holiday De-Stressing Now”

The Gift of Giving

 

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After reading You are a Badass by Jen Sincero, I was inspired to read other publications Jen recommended in her book. Cami Walker’s 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life was one of the books recommended by Sincero. In her book Walker tells the story of how a prescription of intentional giving and journaling has helped her battle the pain and hindrances caused by her multiple sclerosis. It is a powerful story and really propelled me toward a stronger giving purpose.

Taking the 29 Gifts Challenge was a positively impactful experience. For 29 days I intentionally gave gifts and journaled about my giving. The act of giving and reflecting on the impacts made through giving made my life more meaningful.

Excitedly I joined the 29 Gifts Community at http://www.29gifts.org and began to follow Cami Walker and the 29 Gifts page on Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/29Gifts/. Both of these connections inspired me as I saw that there were many others who had taken the 29 Gifts Challenge and were motivated by the book’s message. Continue reading “The Gift of Giving”

How to Treat a Bad Day – Wise Words Wednesday

How to Treat a Bad Day – Wise Words Wednesday

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Bad days seem to be contagious. When you have one bad day, you seem to become a bad day magnet

Bad days stink.

It is easy to say, “Tomorrow is another day,” or “Cheer up. It could always be worse,” but we know those thoughts don’t defeat the dreariness in some cases. The best medicine for a case of the blues is to treat yourself though kindness or charity.

Doing something kind or generous can be the first step in kicking cloudy thoughts to the curb. Not only will your actions help someone else have a better day, but you will quickly find that your friendliness has the same infectious inclinations that the bad days bring. One kind act makes is a lot easier to motivate ourselves to feel accomplished and lovable.

If you aren’t going for the sweet, touchy, feely remedy, remember Mercutio’s crude advice for Romeo after Rosaline’s rejection in The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet. Mercutio roughly advised his friend, “If love is rough with you, be rough with love.” Mercutio’s advice wasn’t exactly dealing with how to treat a bad day, but we can adapt it to fit our treatment purposes. Continue reading “How to Treat a Bad Day – Wise Words Wednesday”

Greatest Prison = What Others Think

Greatest Prison = What Others Think: Wise Words Wednesday

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As I have begun my holiday shopping, my concern for the reactions of others has grown to its typical holiday height. Way too big!

Gifts are to be given out of love, not out of fear for what the recipient will say when they receive it. Similarly, our actions should be done out of love, not because of what others will think.

Who cares what others are thinking? Most of the time our fears are nowhere near what is on the minds of those we worry about anyway.

Don’t imprison yourself with fear.

Don’t hold back in your giving because of your insecurities.

Now I can’t guarantee that all gift recipients will receive with joy, or whatever reaction you are expecting, but I can guarantee that giving with an open heart will open your life to tremendous charity and gratitude.

Set yourself free from concerns about the opinions of others. Release yourself from worries about the words and thoughts of others. Liberate your love by giving without reservations and acting without self-doubt.

Who cares what others think? Love enough to share with them anyway.

By: Melanie A. Peters

P.S. Giving gifts is a great way to show you care. Giving without reservations is a great way to show you love.