Why Moms Need Capes – Wise Words Wednesday

Moms with Capes

Moms are the ones who need capes.

Recently I rescued a little boy from the top of a climbing wall at the local park. His cape was hung up on the back side of the wall and he couldn’t get it over. His arms were draped over the wall behind him at odd angles. It was a frightening moment.

The incident was not, however, unexpected. I had witnessed the boy and his mother arguing about the need to take off the cape while he played. She said, “Take it off.” He said, “No.” It was obvious that she wanted to enjoy their time at the park so she let him have his way.

When I heard his cry for help, I was only about 20 feet away. Without hesitation I ran to him and said, “Don’t be scared. I am a mommy and I am going to get you down.” I lifted him high enough for the snag of the cape to release and his arms to fall down to me. Gently, I set him down so as to not scare him or invade his space too much. His poor mother was coming our way. She thanked me and said, “Wow, you were fast.” I told her it was no problem.

The boy still would not take off the cape. He ran and climbed up to the top of the playground. His cape caught on the slide as he slid downward. Another scary moment. His mama took the cape this time. He cried on the side of the playground until he decided it was better to play than pout.

As I packed up my own little villains, I walked past that poor mom. She thanked me again. I replied, “Moms are the ones who need capes.” She said, “You got that right.” Continue reading “Why Moms Need Capes – Wise Words Wednesday”

Wrongness and Visionaries – Wise Words Wednesday

Visionary Wrongness

There is nothing worse than finding out an idea was a “bad” idea. There are ideas that demand such confidence that is is painful to not have faith in their potential. It is only when we give that idea a chance that we find out if we are visionary or wrong.

sheldoncooper1Sheldon Cooper’s character rarely allows doubt to filter into his decision making process. When a notion is questionable, Dr. Cooper turns to what he knows – science. When science can’t solve it, he blames the conundrum on the imperfections of humanity.

When I am unable to work out a problem, or I begrudgingly discover an idea was not so great, I have to turn to what I do know – my gut instinct. (My attachment to science isn’t as strong as Dr. Cooper’s.) Continue reading “Wrongness and Visionaries – Wise Words Wednesday”

Worry About Today’s Peace – Wise Words Wednesday

Worry about today's peace

Peace. Each day we look, hope, and pray for peace in our lives.

What do we do right after we wish for peace? We worry about all the things that are disturbing our peace. There seems to be a plethora of disturbances in the peace at our home right now so I thought, “Worrying doesn’t take away tomorrow’s troubles. It takes away today’s peace,” was a perfect quote for this Wise Words Wednesday.

As hubby and I have attempted to plan a small vacation, my mind has been consumed by worry over the trip. What is wrong with me? I am planning a vacation. Vacation is supposed to be a stress reducer, but I am letting worry over details I cannot control consume me. It is definitely taking away from today’s peace. I need a vacation from worry.

My children are in a healthy routine of sibling conflict. At this point in the summer, most siblings are in a constant state of “I’m telling Mom.” My children’s inability to get along has me worrying about my success as a parent. That worry prevents me from finding the humor in the boys calling each other a “Tootie McTootieson.” I just need to make peace with the fact that they are going to fight, no matter how many toys, TV channels, or games they have. Continue reading “Worry About Today’s Peace – Wise Words Wednesday”

Stop Watering Those Weeds – July Positivity Challenge

“Stop watering the weeds in your life and start watering the flowers.”

Weeding 2

 

Here is the metaphor for this Intentergy Positivity Challenge:

Flowers = good stuff in your life

Weeds = bad, ugly, life-sucking stuff in your life

This month we need to stop watering the weeds and provide for the flowers in our lives.

Pull out, remove, mow down, stomp out, and destroy the elements of your life that are stopping you from smelling the metaphorical roses and skipping through those figurative daisies.

Debt, negativity, self-doubt, waste, bad habits, tardiness, or lack of attention are all weedy subjects and have the ability to be lessened in our lives.

 png 1 To make your weeding worthwhile, you need to establish a measuring system.

png 1 Set goals.

If you plan to weed out excess spending, make a list of the items or services you don’t need. Establish a budget and determine what you will do to water your success. For example, if you save X amount of dollars, treat yourself to a milk shake or a ticket to the summer box office bargain movie.

When working up the roots of negativity and self-doubt, get ready to dig deep. Eliminating the source of depressing or downbeat influences can be harder than removing the tangible “weeds” in your life.

png 1 Need some tools for weeding out the negative? Try some of these positive practices.

  • Weeding 3Surround yourself with positive people. When you knowingly spend time with individuals who are negative, you allow their negativity to pop up in your thinking too. Go for the happy-go-lucky friends and positive energy will abound.
  • Rest up. Exhaustion is fertilizer for negativity. Take a cat nap here and there. Do what you can to get those 8 hours of healthy sleep a night. Having a happy sleeping space leads to happier mornings and healthier days.
  • Water your body and your positivity. Our bodies work better when they are hydrated. A hydrated body leads to healthier complexion, better digestion, and more efficient absorption of nutrients. Hydration aids in metabolism and provides necessary fluids for muscle function. If your muscles ain’t happy, ain’t no”body” happy.
  • Let the sun shine! Getting plenty of sunshine is integral to a sunny disposition. Vitamin D from the sun does so much for our body, including reducing depression and negative energy. (Don’t forget the sunscreen though. Nothing dims your shine like a sunburn.) 
  • Play DJ Positive. Roll the windows down and blast your favorite tunes. Dance in your kitchen to your favorite songs. Swing your kiddos around the livingroom jamming out to a fast and fun beat. Science has proven that music improves mood and heart rate. Create a positivity playlist and weed out those sad songs. Flowers aren’t the only ones who grow better when music plays.
  • Positive AttirePut on your positive pants. Wear gear that makes you feel good. When you are confident or comfortable in your appearance, there is less room for self-doubt to sprout. Look good and know it. In the words of the late, great Audrey Hepburn, “Happy girls are the prettiest.” (This goes for guys too but it makes you more handsome.)
  • Say “NO” to drama. Turn off the reality TV. Walk away from the ho-hum timeline posts and tweets. Weeding 1Nip the gossip root in the bud. Quit breaking your back to make someone happy who is never going to be happy. Drama is another negative nutrient that we don’t need.

Continue reading “Stop Watering Those Weeds – July Positivity Challenge”

Focused Energy…Where Does It Go?

Where Focus Goes

I would love to blame my inability to successfully focus on the phases of the moon, or my kids’ schedules, or the incurability of freckles but the reality is that I have failed to give myself focus and therefore my energy has gone spastic this summer, but I’m working on it.

png 1 Spastic energy results in ineffective effort.

png 1 Ineffective effort results in failure on epic levels.

What is wrong with me????

png 1 Nothing. Continue reading “Focused Energy…Where Does It Go?”

Humor Wins Every Time – Wise Words Wednesday

Humor Wins Every Time

The ability to laugh is so simple yet so powerful. “Every time you are able to find humor in a difficult situation, you win.”

Sunday I found myself battling a terrible stomach ache at the end of a fun day at the parish picnic. As we drove home, I advised my husband to take the county road home; I was not feeling well. Per my prediction, we did not make it home before I got sick. We had to stop twice in a very short stretch of the road so I could get out to puke.

Upon entering the car the second time, my youngest son was crying. “Does your tummy hurt?” my husband asked him.

“No, I didn’t get to see mommy throw up.” was his angry and pitiful reply.

All I could do was laugh.

My laughter seemed to calm him and led to giggles from my husband and other two kiddos. We rode silently home the rest of the way, except when my husband checked to see if I was okay.

My tummy definitely didn’t win that day, but humor did. In being able to laugh, I showed my kiddos I would be okay and that we don’t need to get upset about little things (like mommy puking). 🙂

While I don’t encourage laughing at sick people, I do encourage you to find the humor in the rough spots of your day. Who knows the laughter you bring to a tough situation may be the catalyst for change. Your joy may be the one thing that was needed to get past a sticky situation or a downward slide. Humor wins every time.

By: Melanie A. Peters

P.S. The picnic didn’t make me sick. It was just a virus.

 

 

Freedom in the form of Forgetfulness – Wise Words Wednesday

Freedom of Forgetfulness

There are so many things I wish I could forget and even more I wish I didn’t.

As my 20th high school reunion looms, there are words, experiences, and embarrassments I wish I could forget. If I could just forget them, I would be free to worry about what I am going to wear, who is going to watch my kids, or how much older I look than I did in 1997.

However, the teenage angst I imposed on myself and the nature of teenagers made high school tough. So tough, in fact, that I purposefully kept distance from most everything I related to those four hallowed years. Those ugly emotions and insecurities held me captive for two decades. Sometimes I still have butterflies in my stomach, when I run into people from high school.

In the planning of our class reunion, Amanda (class president) hunted me down on Facebook and became my “friend.” I have always admired Amanda’s calm demeanor and terrific sense of humor, so I was like, “Cool. Amanda and I are friends again.” After I became Amanda’s “friend,” Amber, Angie, and Jennifer found me and we became friends again. Then I found Casey and Tamara, and we became “friends” again. I think you can see where this is going. Continue reading “Freedom in the form of Forgetfulness – Wise Words Wednesday”

A New Sheriff in Town – Defining What the Position Means

New Sheriff in Town

I have been doing a lot of thinking about lessons learned and it has been harder than I thought because I had done my homework on the issues and/or problems. I gathered data and information for a couple of years and set a course of direction to move the agency forward.

PastorSheriff_3_t_w600_h475.jpgLessons learned – “means an event or events that were not anticipated or a plan that failed for some reason unknown and you learn the hard way.” (Mike Bonham’s personal definition)

I think that, personally, I have a lot of goals for this agency and it seems to be taking too long, but in reality we are on track. I believe that this is in part because I really want the citizens of the county to be proud of their Sheriff’s Office, but the focus should not be ME, it should be the OFFICE as a whole.

png 1 Lesson one – People try to make it about the Sheriff. And I get it; I’m looked at as the leader. (Still hard) 

png 1 Lesson two—I push hard, the employees and myself to move to perfection and to hit the goals that have been established… (Slow down we will get there.)  

png 1 Lesson Three—With so many projects and initiatives, some can get lost in the push. My hope in is having a handle on prioritizing:

  1. Health and Welfare of the employees
  2. Biggest impact on safety and security for the citizens of the county.
  3. Keep spending within Sheriff’s Office Budget

 

Like I said, this has been a lot tougher assignment than I thought it would be. Thanks for the challenge.

The following I released after a 60 day review:  My hope is you can see the consistence and planning.

Bonham 1.jpgI took office in December, this week and we reviewed the first 60 days on the job.
We wanted a “no drama” transition from the leadership of Carl Fowler, who served as interim sheriff.
We Intensified communication — internally and externally — as we have marked the first 60 days.
We have used Facebook, and a soon an updated website, YouTube videos to push information. We credited the media blitz with leading to the arrest of a fugitives, as a direct results.
“We’re looking for ways to distribute information. It’s a work in progress.”
We have stepped up efforts to arrest dealers, save users who overdose and educate the community.
But, my office has yet to engage the medical community in an effort to reduce abuse of prescription narcotics.

What’s to come:

• Crisis Intervention Training:  to prepare all deputies and staff with intervention methods for dealing with citizens suffering from mental illness crisis. Three staffers will complete the 40-hour training, scheduled in May.

• Increased community outreach with a town hall meeting in Linn and other events. The restructured Community Services Unit , the chaplain program, and the Jr. Deputy program.

• Restarting the “Reserve deputy” program, which allows retired law enforcement officers to volunteer. They must have the same training as full-time officers and can work in a range of activities.

“I’m just pleased to report that we’ve hit the marks on our first 60-day plan. “This is not to say we’re done.”
It is the staff that have been working quickly and professionally to meet my expectation. Turnover has remained low, with only minimum changes — retirements and resignations — since I took office.

“The deputies and men and women of the sheriff’s office have been working hard and I’m proud of these accomplishments. We will continue to work hard to produce a professional, competent and compassionate law enforcement agency the citizens of Osage County can be proud of.”

By: Sheriff Mike Bonham

Guest post for 2017 Lessons Learned in the Last Year Intentergy series.

mike bonham 2

Osage County Fair 2016

 

P.S. Last July my children met Sheriff Bonham at the county fair, when he was still running for office. After he shook my five year old’s hand, my son asked, “Why does he want to be the sheriff?” I told him, “Mr. Bonham wants to keep us safe.” My son’s reply, “Okay, I guess we can vote for him.” 🙂  Sheriff Bonham has worked hard to keep lines of communication open with people of our county and safety in the forefront of his tenure. Thank you, Sheriff Bonham, for your willingness to share your personal lessons learned this year. Best of luck to you as you continue to meet these goals and protect our community.

Student or Teacher???

Student or Teacher

As the regular school year has come to a close I find myself sitting here reflecting on the school year and my career as an agricultural educator.  Throughout my 11 years as an educator, there have been many of lessons learned.  Some have been more easily learned than others and some have hit me like a eighteen wheeler running down the interstate.

Though not a new lesson to many of us, but probably one of the most important lessons, is the importance of building relationships.

I am blessed to have the opportunity to not only build positive relationships with myWade 1 students in the classroom but also through the FFA organization. I find many of my week nights, if not working with FFA career development events, following my students and their athletic teams.  Through my attendance at these activities I don’t only develop positive student relationships but develop relationships with their families also.What some overlook is that those relationships can often make or break many of our students and us as educators too.

Over the years I have had the opportunity to work with some of the greatest kids in the world.  Though there is a couple of experiences that stick out the most. One of those this spring a group of student and I traveled the state every weekend from mid February through the end of March traveling from one FFA contest to another.  Over 1,000 miles spent in a van, you get to know each other pretty well. They definitely expanded my knowledge of popular teen music, as the first stop we ever made was to buy an aux cord. During one of our practices one student’s statement really made me realize the importance of positive relationship building.  This student told me I was the closest thing to a dad she had ever had. She appreciated that I cared about every aspect of her life, just not the academics.  The role we take as teachers is continually evolving.  To some students we do become that parental role for others it may be a different. Continue reading “Student or Teacher???”

The Beauty of Acceptance – Wise Words Wednesday

Accepting Beauty

Have you ever been to a point in your life that you only see the negatives? Were all you thought about was what you didn’t have, but wanted to have? Where you picked out everyone else’s flaws because you weren’t satisfied with yourself?

Well I have, and let me tell you what I was doing. I was wasting my life. I was missing all the beauty in my life and losing out on my precious time. You see, I never saw the beauty in what I had. I missed out on some amazing talents, time with my family and memories with my kid. I saw what others were achieving and hated it because I wasn’t doing something exciting with my life.

It wasn’t their fault. They were ACTUALLY DOING something with their life, and I was just crying about mine.

It wasn’t until I was sitting in the back-church pew on Saturday night telling God how much I disliked Him for putting my family though hell that I realized it wasn’t Him. He wasn’t the one making my life seem awful. Negativity was something that I felt I needed to survive. In all honestly what I needed was hope, faith, and courage. Seeing the beauty in life is something many miss. Getting up early just to watch the sunrise and listen to the first sound of the birds can be relaxing and an amazing time to meditate on the day’s happenings. Watching the wind blow through the tress doesn’t have to be a sign of rage and anger anymore. It is the voices of all my loved ones gone from this earth talking to me.

Amy K 1I now sit in the back pew at church and thank God for what He has faced me with. I know that He will never hand me more than I can handle. Having faith in Him took the weight of the world off my shoulders. Seeing the beauty in these gave me the hope I needed to become a stronger woman, wife, mother, and friend.

Now I know that to some they are like, “Duh! Get your head out of your butt and look at what you have.”

In all honestly, after having that dark cloth blinding you for so long, it takes some time to see the real color of the life you live. Not everything has to be black. Why not have your world colored by the joy, the beauty, the success of others? Surrounding myself with others who are positive gives me more courage than I could ever have dreamed of. You see for me, I was heading down a dark and lonely path. Shutting out all those that cared about me. It has taken a lot of work and I’m still not perfect, but I am making progress.

By: Amy Kemna

Guest post for 2017 Lessons Learned in the Last Year Intentergy series.

P.S. I have seen so many amazing transformations in Amy the past year that I just had to have her tell her story. Amy, you are beautiful, and I am thankful for your friendship and willingness to share your thoughts on how wonderful life can be when we gracefully accept God, our imperfect lives, and ourselves. 🙂
– Melanie A. Peters